ndooksicm!

Saya selalu ingat kata-kata dosen saya dulu waktu kuliah degree, "don't ever write when your head is not in a clear state." Well, mungkin itu berlaku saat menulis berita atau artikel yang akan diterbitkan. Kalau untuk entry yang akan dipublish, mungkin kata-kata tersebut cukup diingat saja, bukan untuk dihayati atau diamalkan.  Yes, now I'm not in a clear state of mind . Pikiran saya kacau balau. Tugas belum selesai, proposal penelitian tidak ada progress sudah berbulan-bulan. Belum lagi, semester ini sudah mau tamat saja. Idealnya, saya hanya punya waktu satu semester lagi saja untuk menyelesaikan pendidikan ini. Tapi tampaknya, saya tidak sanggup melakukannya. Mungkin masalah terbesar saya semester ini adalah hilangnya motivasi. Semester lalu saya agak kewalahan tapi saya masih bisa bersemangat begadang membaca segala macam buku dan jurnal dan berusaha menulis paper yang harus dikumpulkan. Tapi semester ini, Ya Tuhaaan kalau ada kata yang tepat untuk meng...

Firstly, I have to say this : tonight is the most interesting class after all these sessions. This subject is called Qualitative Research Method and it has been taught for about nine weeks. (OMG! I just realized that this is the tenth week of the semester!!) And now I'll go to the exact thing I want to say... So, last night (yeah, as I write this piece, it's already 12am. hehe), we taught about research writing. The lesson is about the process of writing thesis, what are the elements of it and how to do those things. But I think the most interesting part of the class is the beginning of the session.  So, before she began the lesson  the lecturer asked us this a truly, madly, deeply question: "Why do you want to do a research?" I was like...Oh, My God! this is a core question that have ever crossed my mind and I just avoided to think it deeper (just like I do with some of my thoughts. well, I'll go into that some other time).  My friends of course came out wi...

Jadi ceritanya saya lagi stress berat sama pendidikan tinggi yang sedang saya jalani ini. Kadang ya saya suka mikir sebelum tidur, "what the hell was I thinking, getting into graduate school?" . Saya tidak menyangka mau dapat gelar Master of Arts itu sungguh gak ada seninya, atau mungkin nilai seninya terlalu tinggi sampai saya gak ngerti, ehm, belum ngerti mungkin.  Oiya, banyak yang nanya sebenarnya saya ambil jurusan apa sih di sini. Baiklah, sini saya jelaskan. Saya mengambil jurusan Komunikasi, sama seperti jurusan waktu saya degree (S1) dulu. Kenapa saya ambil jurusan ini? Alasan pertama adalah biar sama aja sama yang dulu. Kedua, tentu saja, saya cinta sama ilmu ini. Walaupun ilmu komunikasi menurut saya adalah bidang studi yang super galau dan agak serakah. Kenapa? karena semua dipelajari, mulai dari psikologi, sosiologi sampai bahasa. Serakah, ya karena banyak konsep dari ilmu-ilmu tadi yang diambil dan diadaptasi plus dipelajari dalam bidang komunikasi.  Betapapu...

(continued) September Another Hari Raya Idul Fitri that I spent at home. We were so happy because my brother got his annual leave for several days. But I felt a bit sad because I have to go to Penang to start over life as a master student. So most of my September I spent with an adaptation and adjustment again. I felt so lonely at the first time and it was  quite hard to back to an academic life after like one year off. Yeah, back to crazy eating and sleeping schedules and do the things all by my self yet I'm so excited to back to school. Also in this month my friends graduated and I attended their graduation party. Again, there always emotional moments when I have to see my friends leave for home and I don't know when I can see them again. *almostcryingwhentyping* (I posted about this last time). Oyeah, Ayah visited me for a day on September. It was quite fun having such daughter-daddy time.:) With Ayah at Cititel Hotel, Georgetown, Penang October-November Oh, no! ...

Yah, anggap saja sebagai ocehan kelima selama menjadi anak master dan pertama di bulan November. Kali ini bukan cuma ingin merepet gak jelas, tapi juga ingin mensyukuri beberapa nikmat belakangan ini. #eyaaaak Well, saya harus berterima kasih banyak2 buat si Prof karena memberikkan saya A untuk presentasi assignment yang pertama. It was really motivated me to do the next assignment. I really mean it. Walau saya juga ketar-ketir melihat contoh research proposal yang dibagikan. Duh, bisa gak ya buat kayak gitu? -____- Seriously, beruntung sekali teman-teman yang kuliah S1 di Indonesia karena tugas akhirnya bikin skripsi. I think you won't face big trouble in doing you master's thesis. Beda sama saya yang di sini buat sebuta-butanya sama skripsi. Dulu pernah belajar research methodology tapi itu entah tahun kapan udah lupa. Sebenarnya saya pengen nonton drama Korea atau HIMYM season 7 (yang belum sempat saya tonton dari epsiode 1),mtapi saya belum sempat ke warnet buat downl...

So, what to say? or more specifically what to write? I'm still dealing with my postgrad world. I haven't thought that this is really hard. I was kind of miss reading books but now I'm about to vomit just to look at the cover. I know this is Saturday night. No, technically it's already Sunday. I should've going out with my friends, like I always do. But no, I'm sitting on my desk trying to finish these assignments. I feel so dumb looking at the essay I'm writing. I feel useless reading these books. I don't know what to write. I don't know where should I start. Everybody tells me that this is gonna be alright. Yeah, I know, this is just another day. But please I hate cliche advice. I really do. P.S : I'm starving! -_-

I do a lot of thinking lately. Well, actually not only lately, I'm thinking a lot since I was born. Hahaa. But for this matter, yes, lately. As my fourth week of being a postgrad student, I met new people with their opinions, and also old people, means people I used to know, and of course, with their own opinions. Every time conversation stuck into 'the life after university', the subjective and objective view got distracted. what will you do after your student life? what are you going to be after years of education? Will you work for people? will you start your own business? or you're going to back to school, pursue a highest level of study? or maybe, get married, start a family? Since everyone has their own view, I often see that some people can not accept the point of other people. I mean, like, what's wrong with working for people? and what's wrong with pursue the study? and is that a crime of getting married? I have friends that happy (financially o...

Geez! Entry dengan judul 'Rambling' mungkin akan terus berlanjut sampai saya menghabiskan masa studi 1,5 tahun ke depan. Kita lihat sampai nomor berapa postingan jenis ini. Hahaha Well, ini udah minggu ketiga kuliah dan saya masih harus berkutat dengan buku-buku tebal berisi teori dan metode penelitian komunikasi. Plus, tugas-tugas yang entah kenapa saya jadi bodoh membuatnya. Sepertinya dulu kalau buat tugas oke-oke aja. Mungkin saya makin bodoh? atau memang pelajarannya yang tingkat kesulitannya makin tinggi. So, I'm leaning toward the first, karena gak mau dibilang makin bodoh. *defencive mode: ON Sebenarnya saya happy dengan this so called student life. I enjoy reading and attending class, but, oh my God. Why is it so difficult to write the assignments?? Rasanya sulit sekali merangkai kata-kata. *lah, ini buat posting panjang-panjang apa hal?* I'm sorry for my kacau balau grammar and campur aduk language. Tinggal di negara ini memang memaksa saya untuk sedik...

I should be writing on my assignment and thinking about my research proposal. But, no. I've started to read all those books and my mind is full. I can't even write one paragraph for the short essay. This is the second week of my post grad study, And I've already got like 5 assignments. The deadline is next month. But, next month? it's only like 2 weeks more. I actually can't fully concentrate on my assignment since my friends are coming here to attend the convocation. Yeah, I miss the girls and I feel useless if I don't spend my times with them. I know that when I'm out with them, assignments always on my mind. But I'm so glad meeting my friends, my girlfriends. There's no words to say about us. Recalling our (good and bad) old days together and sharing all the recent stories. Oh, thank God you sent them into my life. :) Oh, I really should back to those books. Seriously, this is tough. Please, God lead my way. Oyeah, I congratulate all my ...

There are so much things I'd write if I want to write all happened before I'm here now. It was about 2 weeks ago I arrived here in Penang. Then I did the all that registration thingy, and then voila! I'm officially a postgraduate student.  I sometimes still can't believe that I'm here. It's all different. When I got my degree here, I don't even have any fear to face the class or people. I don't care what people would say after that. I was very independent and yes, selfish girl. But now I feel it's gonna be so challenging. I can't be what I used to be. That doesn't mean I have to be someone else, but I think I need to be more responsible with my self. I have to be more active to gain knowledge, to get to know people and of course, I do really need to read more and more.  So, how should I explain this? Yeah, I'm back to campus life. It's good to be back yet I know it's gonna be (very) tough. I know what I want. And I know I can...

Yeah, sejak ada situs microblogging bernama Twitter, ranah blogspot seperti kehilangan pamornya. Sepertinya orang udah agak malas untuk sekedar meninggalkan jejak di sini. Lebih asyik di Twitter, singkat, padat dan jelas. Gak bisa dipungkiri saya juga masuk di antara kelompok orang tersebut. Tapi karena saya merasa blogspot adalah tempat pelarian sejak Twitter belum ada, rasanya jahat kalau tidak memberi sedikit berita terbaru tentang saya yang belum bisa dikatakan sukses ini. Yaiyalah, kerjaan aja gak punya, alias pegangguran. Jadi, inilah beberapa update-an random yang coba saya kumpulkan dari ingatan plus beberapa coretan di notes saya. *iya, saya masih suka membawa notes dan menulis sedikit di situ daripada harus menulis di aplikasi Memopad dalam handphone . Alasan radiasi* 1. Belakangan ini kegiatan saya adalah mencoba menghangatkan kembali otak yang hampir beku ini. Coba bayangkan, 5 bulan saya nganggur, otak ini sepertinya sudah agak susah untuk menganalisis atau bahkan s...

Oh, Thank God I got accepted! At the same campus with my degree. But I 'm sure that'll be different environment and people. So, see you in September dear books, discussions, assignments, exams, and oh, thesis. :D Btw, I think I should wear heels then. I can't imagine someone asked me "what are you doing here hey little kid? you visit your Mom here?" Hahahahaha.... So, let me enjoy this so called 'waiting' time again. I feel more peaceful now. Watching DVDs, learn Hangul, do my work better and of course, read more and more to just to get back the heat of this brain.  Have a nice day, people.....:)